An insight into my mind

Fainting Goats

2008-05-15T20:28:00.001+12:00

music and musing

2008-02-27T22:50:00.003+13:00

.To carry on the whole switchfoot theme - this is from jon foreman on his myspace

"Lately music has been my compass: it's neither the map, nor the road but a steady constant that can help me make sense of the both."

Totally true, that's one of the biggest things about how i view music put into words only a muso could!

I really wish that I could count myself as more of a muso.. i mean i don't really play instruments, but i guess I can still count myself as one :D

Music is one of the biggest ways that I draw closer to God, it's amazing how much people bare their soul's in music which makes it just such a powerful medium..

Alot of people don't understand how music can mean so much to someone but I'm sure some of you do!

Schuster - Rookie fireman prank

2007-12-21T09:22:00.001+13:00

My song to God (stolen from switchfoot)

2007-12-04T18:40:00.001+13:00

Let that be enough - Switchfoot

Wish I had what I needed
To be on my own
Cause I feel so defeated
And I’m feeling alone
And it all seems so helpless
And I have no plans
I’m a plane in the sunset
With no where to land
And all I see
It could never make me happy
And all my sandcastles
Spend their time collapsing

Let me know that you hear me
Let me know your touch
Let me know that you love me
Let that be enough

It’s my birthday tomorrow
No one here could know
I was born this thursday
Twenty-two years ago
And I feel stuck watching history repeating
Oh am I just a kid who knows he’s needy?

Let me know that you hear me
Let me know your touch
Let me know that you love me
Let that be enough

Let me know that you hear me
Let me know your touch
Let me know that you love me
Let that be enough

Let your love

2007-09-02T14:26:00.000+12:00

Let your love be strong, and I don't care what goes down.
Let your love be strong enough to weather through the thunder cloud
Fury and thunder clap like stealing the fire from your eyes
All of my world hanging on your love...

Let it start tonight
When my world explodes, when my stars touch the ground
Falling down like broken satellites
All of my world resting on your love.

Let your love be strong - Switchfoot

2007-08-20T17:37:00.000+12:00

At a Flight of the Conchords Band photo shoot. (on episode 6 of their TV series)
"germaine, you look depressed, smile." - Murray (band manager)
"I'm supposed to I'm in a band." - Germaine
yus. Go FOTC!
rocks my socks.

2007-08-19T13:34:00.000+12:00

Life and love and why - switchfoot.

Life and love and why
Child adult then die
All of your hoping and all of your searching for what?
Ask me for what am I living and what gives me strength that i'm willing to die for

Take away from me this monstrosity
'Cause my futile thinking's not gonna solve nothing tonight
Ask me for what am I living and what gives me strength that I’m willing to die for

Could it be this?
Could it be bliss?
Could it be all that I ever had missed?
Could it be true?
Can life be new?
And can I be used?
Can I be used?

Give me a reason for life and for death
And a reason for drowning while I hold my breath
Something to laugh at a reason to cry
With everyone hopeless and hoping for something to hope for
Yeah, with something to hope for

Could it be true?
Can life be new?
Could it be all that I am is in You?
Could it be this?
Could it be bliss?
Can it be You?
Can it be You?

Sure, this isn't the best switchfoot song ever, musically or lyrically. But i think it's pretty good.
And i do think the lyrics touch on an issue which is not spoken about often enough, our search for purpose.

I love the line 'Could it be all that I am is in You?'

2007-08-14T13:13:00.000+12:00

I just saw something at Bible college which got me thinking..

they have a memorial grove 'martyr's grove' dedicated to 5 BCNZ (bible college of NZ) graduates who have died at the hands of others,while actively serving God on the overseas mission field.

Just got me thinking a little bit about martyrdom..

what would it be like to be put in a situation where it was Jesus or death?

How could you possibly make the choice to make the ultimate sacrifice in the name of Jesus Christ?

But, on the other hand.

How could you not?!

He is the lord, who reigns forever.

He is the one that has saved this world from its wretched state, brought us out of the pit that we were helplessly stuck in.

He is the one who gave his life.

The least that we can do is give our lives as living sacrifices.

And if this results in death, so be it.

I'd like to think that were i put in a situation where I had to make that ultimate sacrifice, i would choose death, over life knowing that I'd as good as trampled on the saviour who gave his life for me.

But would I:

If I can't even commit my days to him?

If I can't even commit my hours to him?

If I refuse to listen to his commands?

If I can't even follow in his way?

If I struggle to follow his plan?

If I can't even spend 20 mins a day drawing close to him?

If I can't hear his voice? If I'm not even listening?

Then how could I possibly make this ultimate sacrifice.

Hebrews 12:25See to it that you do not refuse him who speaks. If they did not escape when they refused him who warned them on earth, how much less will we, if we turn away from him who warns us from heaven? At that time his voice shook the earth, but now he has promised, "Once more I will shake not only the earth but also the heavens."The words "once more" indicate the removing of what can be shaken—that is, created things—so that what cannot be shaken may remain.
Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our "God is a consuming fire."

So my challange to myself... and to you if you choose to take it is to try to commit every day to Him.

Every hour.

Every minute.

Every second.

Do it!

Backstreet Boys - Inconsolable [FULL]

2007-08-08T20:17:00.001+12:00

Yep. So backstreet boys are back in action.
I actually really like this song :D
Woohoo...

Xtend 07.. best week of my life!

2007-07-18T08:40:00.000+12:00

I got back on saturday night at mid-night from what has to be one of the best weeks of my life !!

I learnt so much about God at this camp called Xtend (its a baptist youth camp held once a year, in tauranga!)

Things i learnt:

- Even though I thought that I'd stopped believing lies about myself, I still do, and I need to renounce those, and replace them with the truth that God wants to speak into my life.

- It is sooo important that you are a real, honest + open person, so that people don't get the wrong idea about who you are. It's sad, but true, that we act differently around different people, we shouldn't be afraid to let people see who we really are!

- Nothing that we ever do is worthy of Jesus. When we feel unworthy of God's love, its because we are! But only through JESUS! He makes us worthy, so when God looks at us, he sees something pure and blameless.

- The Bible is the living, active word of God, which needs to be meditated, chewed, eaten, consumed.

- If you think you can't hear God's voice are you listening?! Because you can't recognise a voice that you never hear. So spending time with God (in prayer + in listening) regularly is hugely important in order to actually be able to hear God's guidance for your life.

So yeah, that's pretty much what I learnt! And probably some other stuff too.

But it was so awesome spending time worshipping God with others, and seeing people support each other when their friends were suffering, rejoicing with one another, responding to God and actively seeking God

INCREDIBLE!

If you ever get the chance to go, I highly recommend it!

Very special song..

2007-07-14T14:07:00.000+12:00

Must have done something right - Relient K

We should get jerseys cause we make a good team
But yours would look better than mine
Cause your out of my league
And I know that it’s so cliche
To tell you that everyday
Spent with you is the new best day of my life
Everyone watching us just turns away disgust
This jealousy they can see that we’ve got it going on

And I’m racking my brain for a new improved way
To let you know you’re more to me than what I know how say
Your okay with the way this is going to be
Cause this is going to be, the best thing we’ve ever seen

If anyone could make me a better person, you could
All I gotta say is I must have done something good
You came along one day, and you re-arranged my life
All I gotta say is I must have done something right,
I must have done something right

And maybe I’m just lucky cause it’s hard to believe
Believe that somebody like you, end up with someone like me

And I know that it’s so cliche
To talk about you this way
But I’ll push all my inhibitions aside
It’s so very obvious to every one watching us
That we have got something real good goin on

And I’m racking my brain for a new improved way
To let you know you’re more to me than what I know how say
Your okay with the way this is going to be
Cause this is going to be, the best thing we’ve ever seen

This song is truly great :D

Masquerade..

2007-07-01T16:58:00.000+12:00

meeks, me, chloe
its ha-uge
she is a strange woman that one.. no, the other one :P
le masque.

Masquerade.. paper faces on parade!

Fantastic, masqeurade formal dinner at church :D

was great fun.

spent the afternoon making masks/beautifying.

then dinner :D

then dancing like mad :D

Sometimes I wonder...

2007-06-23T23:26:00.001+12:00

if God's the only one who thinks I'm beautiful.

And even that doesn't help much..

Don't comment on what I've said. i just wanted to complain.

bye

2007-05-31T20:58:00.000+12:00

stolen from anchor and braille's blog:

when a scorpion stings your hand.
there once was a hindu holy man who saw a scorpion floundering around in the water. he decided to save it by stretching out his finger. but the scorpion stung him. the man still tried to get the scorpion out of the water, but the scorpion stung him again. a man nearby told him to stop saving the scorpion that kept stinging him. but the holy man said, "it is the nature of the scorpion to sting. it is my nature my love. why should i give up my nature to love just because it is the nature of the scorpion to sting?"it should be our nature to love regardless of who we are, regardless of what has been done to us. its hard. i know. trust me. people are always going to sting you. they are going to rip into your character. they are going to be the ones in the platform telling you that your views are wrong. they are going to be in the pulpits pointing fingers in judgement. they are going to be the ones who hold your whole race responsible for the actions of one person's actions.but that doesn't give you the right to despise; for hate for those who hate is still hate. in spite of those who may sting you remain in what you know to be your nature. love.

end quote.

this sooo fully applies to God too.
isn't that cool.

anyone who hasn't heard of anchor and braille, they should have.
it's stephen christian's (anberlin frontman/leadsinger) solo project.
it's incredible.

www.myspace.com/woodwaterrecords

www.myspace.com/anchorandbraille

what hurts the most.

2007-05-22T22:21:00.000+12:00

What hurts the most

Was being so close

And having so much to say

And watching you walk away

And never knowing

What could have been

And not seeing that loving you

Is what I was tryin' to do

Rascal flatts. - What hurts the most

2007-05-21T22:52:00.000+12:00

has any one else seen this series of brilliant! cards.
they are brilliant!
like emo spiderman.
in fact the whole spiderman movie. brilliant. just brilliant. * sweeps fringe over forehead while pouting *
by brilliant i mean, that you can not keep a straight face or take it seriously because it's just so funny.
no matter if it's meant to be or not.
like my reading story today (thanks to sam's strange/sick? mind)
i could only keep a straight face wen reading it to a 3 and a half year old.
or the quote "run into a friend in the street"
i was going to add a slightly insensitive equation here. but then decided not to.
i could do some hand motions.
but you wouldn't see them
so i give up.
that is also brilliant.

refuse to be put in a basket.

is brilliantly ambiguous.

which is a brilliantly large word (Although not funny, maybe the normal definition of brilliant applies here).

is anyone else confused?

I would just like to ask this simple question for your comments: Is it ever possible to seperate your perception of a certain 'truth' from the truth itself.
could you ever know the 'truth' of something without your perception getting in the way?
contrast how you can know 'love' or how you can know 'how a car works'.
interesting isn't it.
would be keen to hear your thoughts.
my horse is pretty too.
prettier than yours.

and you are brilliant.

BRILLIANT!
don't worry. i don't actually think the question is simple.

i am being cheeky/annoying.
from time to time this is allowable.

My meta-narratively shaped chemical romance

2007-03-19T17:36:00.000+12:00

"Son when you grow up, will you be the saviour of the broken, beaten and the damned"

doesn't that just make you think of jesus... it does for me anyway

and trust me, i had plenty of time to think about it in the 36 hours that this song was stuck on my head!

oooh dear

hugs all round

2007-03-18T14:28:00.000+12:00

Chasing sheepies....
Soooooo purdy

hugs all round

by the way, this is my horse

haha

2007-03-18T14:26:00.000+12:00

The product of a days hard lectures....

2007-02-21T22:57:00.001+13:00

an earthquake...

and i didn't even feel it

how sad

in other news,

i have a horse!

time for some sanity sleep... see ya

Mountaintop Addiction

2007-02-08T17:37:00.000+13:00

It's easy to get addicted to the mountaintop experiences of God - the camps, the spiritual highs
This is my pondering on the topic...

Mountaintop Addiction

Mountaintop firelight
Fan the flame in my soul
Now I know he’s alive
And I’ll run by his side

Easy come, easy go
Not that way, I will grow
Through the pain, through the fight
Though nothing goes right

When I can’t feel a thing
Everything’s gone, There’s a hope
Still alive, I know deep inside
That its worth holding on

Through nothing at all
When everything’s gone
No trace, no shadow
Played up on the wall

Still I hold on
Still I hold on

Through the flood, through the fire
Through the desert, the plain
Till the numbness subsides
I can feel him again

Valleys of daylight
Dull warming glow
The flame in my soul
Still alight, heart afloat
I know my redeemer
Is with me still now
As I walk by his side

I’ll hold on
I’ll hold on

When I say..

2007-01-31T22:20:00.000+13:00

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not shouting "I'm clean living" I'm whispering "I was lost" Now I'm found and I'm forgiven.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I don't speak of this with pride. I'm confessing that I stumble and need CHRIST to be my guide.

When I say.... "I am a Christian" I'm not trying to be strong. I'm professing that I'm weak and need HIS strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not bragging of success. I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say.... "I am a Christian" I'm not claiming to be perfect. My flaws are far too visible but, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I still feel the sting of pain. I have my share of heartaches So I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I"m not holier than thou, I'm just a simple sinner who received God's good grace, somehow.

I wish more people would have this humbler view of our christianity, although it's of course so easier to slip into 'holier than thou' thinking...

wat are your views?

2007-01-30T17:54:00.001+13:00

Me on molly...
Peace...

Some photos from horse camp...

2007-01-16T09:24:00.000+13:00

Me climbing hill on Lady Bug
Three of the (many) random random peoples at camp... haha Sam, Jesh and Beth ...
Aren't we all so hot... actually it was rather (Rach, Me, Katie, Alex, Kat and Betty in the front)
Pretty morning... J-dog's photo
Greased lightning... what more can i say!

2006-12-31T20:16:00.000+13:00

Um... a post... mmm... wat to say....

eerrrrrr

ummmmm

not like it matters... no one reads this anyway.

How about I say: HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Now...

Well, life is good... i'm about to leave 2mrw for horse camp!

And then i'm back for a week - working all week!

And then i leave for another horse camp! This time I'm a leader at a little (y7-9) girls horse camp which will be fun!

Then parachute...

Then i work for 3 weeks before uni starts again!

That's life.

So... Happy New Year!

the thief

2006-12-07T10:12:00.000+13:00

Your eyes are full, full of the future of us
The air changes as you look across at me in that wondering way
it is as if I knew you before we spoke
Do our hearts know something we don't?
Conspiring, converging without giving us any say

You sing me to sleep, talk down my walls
Look through my windows as I wait
You could be the thief I give the key to

You're ruining me with secrets and gestures and looks
With sonnets in second-hand books
Playing the chords in me nobody knew how to play

You sing me to sleep, talk down my walls
Look through my windows as I wait
You could be the thief I give the key to
It fits in your hand like the water in rain
It unlocks our two different selves and shows we are the same
Rather than wait til I put me out for the taking
You're breaking
You're breaking into my heart... and I'm letting you

Your eyes are full, full of the future of us.

Ah Brooke Fraser and a guitar... one of my favourite sounds!

This gorgeous song of hers can speak for itself....

2006-11-24T13:41:00.000+13:00

I'ts been a month and a day... did you miss me?
Bet you didn't...
Well the reason that I've been so slack at updating lately is because life has just been sooo freakily stressful! Uni has been hectic, and i had a piano exam on wednesday, and a few stressful weeks at work to add to it all!
Anyway, it's over now!
My piano exam went ok... altho i forgot easy scales, which sucks.
Uni is finished!!! I survived first year uni!
And work... well got lots to do still, but oh well.

Here's some lyrics that kind of express a very common situation in christians, and i guess kind of describes the place that I have been in lately, and am trying to get out of!

Be my Escape - Relient K

I'm giving up on giving up slowly
I'm blending in, so you won't even know me
Apart from this whole world that shares my fate

This one last bullet you mention
Is my one last shot at redemption
Coz I know to live you must give your life away

I've been housing all this doubt, and insecurity
I've been locked inside that house
All the while you hold the key
I've been dying to get out
And that might be the death of me

And even though there's no way of knowing
Where to go
I promise I'm going because

Oh, I gotta get out of here,
I'm stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
Oh, I gotta get out of here,
And i'm begging you, i'm begging you, i'm begging you
to be my escape

I've given up on doing this alone now
I have failed, and I'm ready to be shown how
You've shown me the way, I'm trying to get there

And this life sentence that I'm serving
I admit that I'm every bit deserving
But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair

I've been housing all this doubt, and insecurity
I've been locked inside that house
All the while you hold the key
I've been dying to get out
And that might be the death of me

And even though there's no way of knowing
Where to go
I promise I'm going because

Oh, I gotta get out of here,
I'm afraid that this complacency, is something I can't shake
Oh, I gotta get out of here,
And i'm begging you, i'm begging you, i'm begging you
to be my escape

I am a hostage, to my own humanity
Self detained and forced to live in this mess of me
And all I'm asking is for you to do, what you can with me
But I can't ask you to give what you already gave

I've been housing all this doubt, and insecurity
I've been locked inside that house
All the while you hold the key
I've been dying to get out
And that might be the death of me

And even though there's no way of knowing
Where to goI promise I'm going because

Oh, I gotta get out of here,I'm stuck inside this rut that i fell into by mistake
Oh, I gotta get out of here,
And i'm begging you, i'm begging you, i'm begging youto be my escape

I fought you for so long, I should have let you win
Oh, how we regret those things we do
All I was trying to do was save my own skin
Oh, but so were you,
So were you

Top 10...

2006-10-23T19:13:00.000+13:00

Bad pick up lines.. except not 'pick-up' in the bad sense of the word.... 'pick-up' in the sense of getting a girl to notice you...

anyway here goes

sorry me and monique came up with these... and it's sad the number of these that came out of things i said to her brother haha

1. Hey you're pigeon toed

2. You have a wart on your elbow *in a creepy french accent*

3. IT's not what's on your head that attracts me to you, it's whats in it.

4. you're like a flash of lightning, but not as bright

5. My grandma and her friends were looking at photos of you the other day and were amazed at how good looking you've become

6. I didn't mean to play footsies with you

7. You look like your mum/dad

8. Do I look good in your sisters hat?

9. Light travels faster than sound

10. You're so smart

i apologise profusely (hehe i love that word...) i wrote another post on paper... and was saving it until i could be bothered typing it up and now i've lost it!!!

sorry... you'll have to survive until i find it :D

bye for now

i'm not tired, really

2006-10-17T23:39:00.000+13:00

woweee

i am so tired

thus, this post is boring

night night

2006-10-14T12:26:00.000+13:00

Isn't this awesome...

2006-10-12T19:24:00.000+13:00

wow, teacher's college is so sweet at the moment... this unit is one of those one's that make people think that teacher's college is just a piece of cake...when it's not
it's actually a piece of pie.

anyways, i get to tell one of my favourite childhood stories on monday! so that should be good

haha me and hot things... food... drinks ... are a really bad combination
just ask sam to explain! :P

catcha later....

watch this space... a really juicy post coming soon!

2006-10-11T18:01:00.000+13:00

Well, hey there.... here's a great site of musical mavelry!!!
They send you free downloads and stuff.... it's very very exciting!
It's funny, this week i got sent a free download from a little kiwi band... who is making a name for themselves in america 'Detour 180' quite cool i must say
although my 2nd cousin's not in the band anymore... so there goes my claim to fame!
anyways, heres a link
http://www.hearitfirst.com

In reality, I'm only doing this to win a competition... but all of the above is completely true!!!!

RAAAAR!!!

2006-10-06T23:22:00.000+13:00

i got attacked by a killer spider today

only it turned out it was a wasp

thank goodness it was a cold, sleepy wasp who didn't get aggravated by my:

galloping across the backyard to get dad to save my life
spasmodic spasming
writhing
and yell[ow]ing 'GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF!'

twas fun

specially when my darling daddy saved my life.....

that was the best part

Lessons from the Garden

2006-10-06T23:10:00.000+13:00

Well i was gardening today... for the second time this week!!!!

Anyway today it was my garden i was demolishing and rebuilding... was kinda fun except for the time constraints....

I was thinking about weeds... no not WEED! weeds

and i was thinking, 'how come they are weeds, how are they any different to the rest of the plants'

and i realised ' we call them weeds because the spread easily and don't have pretty flowers'

which is pretty much the essence of it.

Suddenly i became all philosophical (OOOOO big word) and was thinking about life... and weeds...

the people 'weeds' in life are the outcasts, the ones who are different from us, the ones who 'don't have pretty flowers' and the get pulled out of normal society and chucked in the dump... or the gutter as the case may be.

Isn't that Sad! :(

Why? just because they are different from us

let's be nice (as much as i hate that word) and kind people and be friendly towards people who are different from us

they are what makes the world an interesting place

Can i break the spell...

2006-10-04T17:34:00.000+13:00

...of the typical.

A very cool song i found today 'typical' by mute math, a very cool band!

check them out

www.purevolume.com/mutemath

fantastic....

pizza....

2006-10-02T23:05:00.000+13:00

pizza.... an interesting topic to ponder, at the best of times... why does the topping always fall off?????? WHY? WHY????????

isn't the cheese supposed to stick it on... and the tomato sauce...

hmmm

and OSTRICHES DON'T LIVE IN HOLES!

2006-10-02T22:25:00.001+13:00

hey everyone... i just remembered a very funny thing that happened on saturday night... i went bowling

HAHAHAHAH

stop laughing, that wasn't the joke!

well, it was a part of it, i went bowling and in the process of being very focussed with forward motion, of both myself and the bowling ball... i managed to, at the height of my backwards swing... drop the ball!!!!!

Yes sirreeee that's right, I dropped a bowling ball backwards in the process of trying to put the bowling down the lane ....

and i just learnt a new pick up line... 'you haven't lived in New Zealand your whole life, have you? '

thanx to meeks squeeks...

october...

2006-10-01T22:02:00.000+13:00

wow, my first post for october... this year has flown by, although i must say that this has been one of my best years thanx to my masters mates... love you guys!
Twas a mint storm today one of the lightning strikes was so close i only got to one-higelty... before it struck! Pretty cool...

Australia has the meanest electrical storms... when i lived in Brisbane we had some amazing tropical lightning storms... they'd make the whole house shake hardcore and you'd get kind of scared..... but they were fun all the same.

Then there was the time when we were out driving and it was overcast (but not raining) and all of a sudden it poured so hard dad couldn't see the road at all and had to slowly and carefully pull into a side street... twas an experience.

Well, hope october sees you all well and happy

Signing out for the night

Oh Mr Sun!

2006-09-27T16:45:00.000+12:00

I apologise profusely if i have gotten annoying i-can't-believe-i-remember-that barney songs stuck on your head.... but isn't it fantastic that the sun came out!

It's soooo nice... except for when i am sitting in front of the computer hurting my eyes in the coldest part of the house so i can get my assignment done so i can have a holiday. * breaths*

well, big news! I handed it in!!!!! YAY like almost 2 weeks early! (i'm not a geek really!)

and i got kutless' new CD hearts of the innocent - from Julie for my birthday with the money she gave me!

It's fantastic.......

yay.... im' happy

so, how are you? comment please!

haven't been around much....

2006-09-17T11:33:00.000+12:00

Hey all, sorry I haven't posted in the last week (although it's not like anyone reads this anyway!).

Been pretty busy with assignments and work and stuff... at uni we've been studying theology and it's implications for education. I've really been enjoying it, I love having deep theological discussions. You can check out some of the discussions at www.ew12god.blogspot.com

What fantastic fun....

catcha later

The stars are blind?

2006-09-11T10:42:00.000+12:00

Well, i thought i'd help poor old paris out with her song writing

i thought this was a little more appropriate considering the musicianship of her song 'stars ar blind'

Chorus:

Even though my label's crazy
Even though my fans are deaf
If you show me real music baby
I'll show you my try!

No seriously, I really think that this girl needs prayer... let's pray that some christian can get into her inner circle and show her where to find true happiness ( a.k.a not making really bad music to try to get more famous, if that's even possible!)

Think of nice things...

2006-09-10T11:35:00.000+12:00

on friday i went to a funeral, one of my friend's grandads died last week.

Funerals always put life into perspective a bit, and make me think (and make me cry!)

I hope people will be saying good things about me at my funeral.

(Btw, I hope you don't get scared off by the amount of stuff on my blog! I just tend to vent on here, so don't feel like it's all or none! Also I'd love to hear you guys' comments!)

2006-09-08T12:07:00.000+12:00

rev rev black car
have you any petrol?
no driver, no driver
it's too expensive

2006-09-05T19:33:00.000+12:00

yet another post spawned from my course at the moment, it's very thought provoking stuff

a free verse poem contemplating on/praying to God

Lord, you are truly great, loving and holy
but you are so much more than that
Your incredible glory is shown through creation
but you are so much more than that
Your actions speak of your goodness and grace
but you are so much more than that

We have taken your image
photocopied it
cut it up
into a jigsaw

now we piece it back together
the end result
but an image

of an image-less God

a drop
in an ocean
a ray
of an infinite sun

We try to understand you
but you are so much more than that.

2006-09-05T18:18:00.000+12:00

This was written as a part of the unit we are doing at teachers college at the moment. We have to get involved in a blog (http://www.ew12god.blogspot.com/) and we are asked to answer 5 questions over the course.
This was the first one:
Question 1: If GOD created everything, did he also create evil?
There are more than a few conundrums in the Bible and our theology - one such paradox is the existence of Satan and demons, and evil. Did GOD create these beings? Did He create evil? How would you respond to a person who says, I can't believe in GOD, look at all the suffering, pain and evil in the world? Imagine you lived in AID's ravaged Uganda - everyone you knew, dying around you? Could you believe and love a GOD who would allow this?

This was my answer:
God is the creator of everything. The bible clearly shows that. However, I do not believe that this means he created evil. God created goodness and fellowship with him. He created us to love him, but he did not want jus robots who talk about how much they love God. He wanted intelligent, thinking beings that would make the choice to love God. Thus, he gave Adam and Eve the choice to obey his command to not eat from the tree or to disobey that command, and suffer the consequences.
The choice that Adam and Eve made to eat from that tree was a choice to do evil, and a choice to follow satan.
On the other hand, satan and the demons were created by God. But he did not make them to be what they are today. But the angels, like humans, were given rational minds and free will to turn away from God's love and to fall into sin.
A very controversial passage about satan's fall out of heaven is ezekiel 28. some say that this is about satan and others say it is about the King of Tyre which is referred to in v 1. I did a little bit of web research on this topic and have discovered two different viewpoints about the passage, both backed up convincingly and biblically.
The viewpoint that supports this passage being about satan argue that this is a passage exemplifying ‘double fulfilment’. this means that the verse was about an earthly king but also refers to satan’s fall out of heaven. They back this up by saying that the language in the passage is obviously also referring to a celestial being, as it says

" `You were the model of perfection,
full of wisdom and perfect in beauty. 13You were in Eden,
the garden of God… You were anointed as a guardian cherub, for so I ordained you…You were blameless in your ways from the day you were created till wickedness was found in you… So I drove you in disgrace from the mount of God, and I expelled you, O guardian cherub, from among the fiery stones.

What man is perfect? The bible says “For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God” (Rom 3:23). They argue that this shows that the passage is about Satan.

Also the words ‘mount of God’ was apparently imagery for the throne of God, not a place where a mere man would be. On the other hand, the cherubim were the angels who guarded the throne of God.

But if this were about Satan, wouldn’t God say that? Or is this all a part of the unfolding metanarrative, this hidden meaning?

On the other hand, others argue that this song used hyperbolic (hugely exaggerated) language to make a mockery of this king. They say that verse 12 “Son of man, make a song of grief for the king of Tyre, and say to him..." does not mean make a sad song about the king of Tyre, but make a song that is mocking of him and will cause him grief. They go on to say that the verses mentioned above show that this guy thought way too highly of himself, through a kind of sarcastic poetry.

But then why God put in the bible something that would so easily lead people astray?
So what do you guys think of this?

Isaiah 14 is another one of these controversial ‘double fulfillment’ passages.
There are other passages that speak of Satan’s turn away from God( Revelation 12:7-9 being the only example that I have at the moment, but I think there are more, don’t quote me on this one), that are more specifically about Satan, and this would make me think that, for us, having the fully unfolded metanarrative that God would want us to look back at passages like Isaiah 14 and Ezekiel 28 and see that there was this extra meaning behind it, and have a more fuller understanding of what satan did through this.
But I really don’t know.

Also, do you think that Satan’s fall from heaven occurred before creation?
I think that it must have for satan to have manifested in the body of the serpent at Eden. But I don’t really know, was thinking about that today.

The funniest thing is that the comment was supposed to be around 50 words! haha

Why is the opposite of highly not lowly?

2006-09-04T19:52:00.000+12:00

Or is it.... Serious questions to be pondering on the way back from my bro and I's road trip out to burger fuel for dinner.

Oh, and my 2 hours last night still to go on my assignment did turn into a bit more.

let's just say that I didn't get much sleep.

I miss Xtend!

I finally got my CD of photos and it made me want to be back there.... I might actually email some Xtend people now that I remembered about it. I've been meaning to for ages, but y'know the way it is.

Or maybe you don't.

Oh well,

Have great sleeps (well, i'm going to be off to bed soon anyway, i tired)

Crikey, he's dead?

2006-09-04T19:45:00.000+12:00

Well, very sad news guys...

The Crocodile Hunter has died, no jokes.
He was killed when he was punctured in the chest with a stingray barb while shooting an underwater documentary in Northern Queensland.

As much as I didn't really like the guy, because of his brash and abrasive style, I'm still sad.
I know it has come to a shock to the whole world, and I can't even begin to imagine how his family would be feeling right now.

When my bro said dat he had died, I thought he was joking!

Well, I mean, that is to be expected when you cheat death for a living, but he was so good at it, that you'd think he was just about invincible.

Sad.

I don't need a mood ring... my fingernails do it all for me

2006-09-04T00:08:00.000+12:00

Just take a look at them...

... well OK don't, you really don't want to see

I'm stressed and if you saw them you could tell!

I'm stressed because I put preparing a church service (which was on tonight) above assignments and now I'm going to have a looooong night trying to get my stupid assignment done. Well OK maybe only two more hours... hopefully

That's why i'm on blogger...

"Your logic is flawed"

Bah humbug

"DON'T TELL ME THAT!"

2006-08-31T23:10:00.000+12:00

All I have to say is:

Who let the squirells out? Who? Who? Who? Who?

Actually, that's a lie!

All I have to say (before I go to bed) is:

Who let the squirells and scandinavian water possums out? Who? Who? Who? Who?

adventures...

2006-08-30T22:54:00.000+12:00

Well, after my adventures waiting AN HOUR! at the bus stop:

freezing cold,
scarf wrapped around my face making me look shifty
with it starting to rain

and the bus finally coming

then

I got a VERY unwanted massage on the bus... if you know what I mean, you know the good ol' great north road potholes... great fun... NOT!

then

Well, I tried to go to starbucks at Lyn Mall... which btw only has a B food safety rating now (displayed by the door, why would you do that with only a B!) and was also closed.

So I thought, I'll go to McCafe and get a Hot Chocolate to warm me up!

So I walk in
I look at the menu
I see a sign saying 'winter warmers' and I see something delectable looking called 'Cookies & Cream Frappe'.
Now bearing in mind that I am no coffee connoiuseur (or however you spell that word, silly French!)
I ordered this 'frappe'.
When I get it, I take a sip, to realise that it was... ICY... COLD

So much for their 'WINTER WARMERS'

Why would they put an iced drink on a menu called that.... i mean... honestly!

WHO WOULD DO THAT?

well folks, we all know the answer to that question don't we, McD's would!

signing out,

don't forget folks, SHEEK SHAFE SHELTER!

or better yet, SHEEP SHAVE SHMELTER!

Don't ask me, ask an ask-pop

Ode to the bus

2006-08-30T22:40:00.000+12:00

For the director of music
To the tune of Never Alone - Barlow Girl

I waited for the bus, today
But it didn't show, Oh no
I needed it, to take me home
So where did it go?

They told me to go to the bus stop
Said it'd be there
and I just haven't seen you
Are you still coming?

I stood there with no way home
and I can only feel the wind on my skin
And my ears hurt, that's all I know
I'm here
and you're not

I only have a scarf to keep me warm
Oh oh
And I waited at the stop
And where are you?

You never come on time
You say you'll be there
You always keep me waiting
Why won't you come?

I'm waiting with no way home
I can't see you coming down the road
When are you gonna come to take me home
I'm here
and you're not

The rain is falling now
I'm getting colder
The bus still isn't here
I'm still waiting

You never come on time
You say you'll be there
You always keep me waiting
Why won't you come?

I'm waiting with no way home
I can't see you coming down the road
When are you gonna come to take me home
I'm here
and you're not

The Best Blog of my life

2006-08-27T17:36:00.000+12:00

* Erratum – Replace today with 'last thursday' throughout.

SILLY BLOGSPOT... IT’S RUINING MY LIFE, LIKE YOU CAN’T EVEN IMAGINE... I’ve been planning this blog all day...only to get to my computer...type in the html and find......

BLOGSPOT WAS ALL GOOPED UP... KAPUT...BROKEN...NOT THERE!
Sorry about the yelling... sometimes I just can’t control myself because
It was most... vexing (hehe meeks)... mmm well anyway:

I realised today... my blog makes me seem like an emotional, pathetic girl. But that’s not me... that’s only the impression you get from here.
No matter what stereotype you try to fit me in... It just won’t fit.

If you think I’m a ditsy girl.... I am... but I’m not
If you think I’m a rock chick... I am... but I’m not
If you think I’m desperate... I’m not

If you think I’m immature... I am... but I’m not
If you think I’m smart... I am... but I’m not
If you think I’m your average Jill.... I’m not

No matter what Box you put me in
I don’t fit
Unless you have a special box
Just for me

Mhm... Me, in a poem... it’s better than me in a post card (ay meeks!)

Well today was such a great day...

We had this (sort of) scary (sort of) old lady teaching us about poetry and creative writing... I actually found it (sort of) interesting.

The funniest bit though was when she did a rap! Sam could barely contain his laughter... it was so funny... actually Sam’s face was just about funnier than the lady rapping (Sort of), twas overall quite amusing.

After school me and (some of) mah uni mates went ten pin bowling... and then to pizza hut.

Let me let you in on a little secret....

Last time I went bowling I got.... 6.... no, not strikes.... no just six

Yeah... single figures

Sad isn’t it. Well, I couldn’t very well see, no contacts had me, my hand-eye’s never been the best, and well, that explains the rest.

I also didn’t bowl the whole game... I gave up half way through

Well today... I got more than 6!

It was like ... amazing (for lack of a better word)

I actually got like... a spare ... and some other pins down ... it was like.... incredible!

But the best part of the day was:

- dancing to the music with the girls
- getting a present from geoff...and a really nice note
- ‘A Beautiful Day’ A present from Ruthy... my (sort of, in more ways than one) Little sister.
- the cute card from Jenna (that she likes looking at!)
- Having some of my bestest mates with me
- PIZZAAAAA
- The beautiful poem..
- I’m married to a chicken (well, it’s better than a long-drop)
- My cake, with a cone for a candle that just wouldn’t blow out
- “ I love it when they describe people as ugly”
- Jenna turning in the ‘OUT’ and then freaking out (it was (partly) my fault)
- Being animals with the most darlingest 2 yr old at lunch time today!
- Getting stared at for screaming and laughing maniacally in the pizza hut bathrooms ( I really don’t understand this ay...)
- and all the other ‘you just had to be there’ moments

And to top it all off... we had a car park (3-person) dance party.

I will never forget this birthday party, the one where me, Jenna and Buffy danced like madwomen in the car park outside our teacher’s college.... to ‘It’s raining men’

Car park Dance parties are the best!

If you haven’t tried one... you are MISSING OUT!!!!

The funniest thing was the security parking guy who was parking people from the event at the trust stadium across the road in our carparks... but anyway

He called someone up, half way through our first song ‘Ironic’ and we were scared he was going to call a security guard to come get us ‘drunk’ people. WE weren’t drunk... only soft drinks... but we were worried all the same
So we

Kept Dancing!

And to top it all off

“ I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair” ...

Is STUCK (and when I say stuck I mean STUCK) ON MY HEAD!
Yes, On

I did say On

Didn’t I?

Oh mmmm

Odd

Yes, songs have a way of getting stuck on my head... it is .... interesting!

This was... (sort of)long (for lack of a better word)

Beat beat beat upon the tom-tom...

2006-08-22T21:47:00.000+12:00

This was spurred on by Sam's
latest blog:
http://theguruoffunkyslippers.blogspot.com/2006/08/macphisto.html...

I read Walk on - The Spiritual Journey of U2 for a history assignment that I did on U2 - twas a pretty mint assignment to say the least.
It's quite a challenging read ... it challenges your thoughts about christianity's definitions etc.

Bono is quite an inspiration to me, because of his heart, and sure, there are things about him that aren't very 'christian' and I can't make the judgement on whether or not he's a christian, and none of us can, but he still inspires me.

A lot of the stuff that he says in the book is about the legalism of the church. Legalism basically means the laws... they "You shall" and "You shall not" 's.

Sam commented, and I agree that this is in contrary to the message of the gospel. It makes it more a social obligation than something from the heart. It's a challenging thought to be a christian right from the core, from the heart,and not because of the laws, but because of the grace we've been given. I believe that wherever you are... we are the light... and we have to be acting as children of the light. I also believe that it is important to have a strong commitment to the Body of Christ (not necessarily 'church' as many define it). But our commitment is first and foremost to God, and then to the Body of Christ (which is a direct flow-on of our commitment to God) very interesting and thought provoking stuff ...

I sick

2006-08-21T21:00:00.000+12:00

Yucky.... I sick *sneezes*
I better get better quick... I have youth group camp this weekend that I'm supposed to be worship leading for some of it... and I can't sing right now.
Very not cool!

Anyone who wants to pray for me... feel free :D

And pray for the people affected by the death of that student, whose body they found last thursday/friday in wellington... I know someone who knew the guy (well, the sister of the guy)
and yeah, the funeral was today.... prayer for the family and friends would be good.

2006-08-19T11:52:00.000+12:00

Found a song which many of you can probably identify with (that is the single one's of you, which is most of you) obviously you may have to replace the he with she and the she with he throughout, but in essence it's the same. Oh, i'm sure you guys get it, you're all smart!

He stood alone - by One Man's View:

he stood alone
waited for time to turn by
saw them holding hands
wondered when he would do the same

he, he wondered if she would come
he, he wondered if there was a one

be still and know there’s a time for everything
under the sun it says
a time to embrace
a time to refrain

he, he wondered if she would come
he, he wondered if there was a one
he wondered, he wondered, he wondered
he, he wonderd if there was a one

Tiredness!!!!!!!! A Nanna and proud of it!

2006-08-18T22:37:00.000+12:00

Oh gosh, I just can't seem to shake my tiredness from placement... I've been getting an ordinary number of hours of sleep, and it just doesn't seemt to be making a difference. It's very 'frushtating' to quote my darling buffy... check out her blog www.buffyandjujubees.blogspot.com and also sam's www.theguruoffunkyslippers.blogspot.com Buffy's may not be as funny if you don't know her... but Sam's ... it'll blow you away! haha altho most of you probably know that already... oh well

ummmmm

i better go to the place where little old ladies belong at this time of nite, to bed! haha

2006-08-15T18:05:00.000+12:00

Here's a really beautiful song by a guy called Adam Watts - if you never heard of him(which, granted, you probably havent'!) you should check him out, his songs are really beautiful and thought provoking, kind of mellow too! I like it, i like it a lot. Random trivia fact... well all of you would have heard the Song Beautiful Soul by Jesse McArtney... well Adam Watts actually wrote it... as well as producing many other BEC (and other) recording albums incl. Jeremy Camp and others... he also plays some mint guitar(and some other instruments), has a great voice, writes amazing songs... he actually played pretty much all of the instruments on his CD, wrote, produced, engineered and mixed all of the songs on his CD! He's quite a genius one might say!
haha
anyway, enough of a rant
(well not quite actually! haha )
This is such a gorgeous song... I hope some guy thinks like this about me some day:

How does it Feel

Hey beautiful lady
how does it feel to know that you got me
head over my heels

I'm thinking that maybe I could be lost
Do you wanna find me
Forget the cost

Just enjoy me
Enjoying what I see
I see you
You

Hey beautiful lady
Are you for real
I'm hearing your heartbeat
I'm watching as you steal mine

I know that you're pacing
Taking your time
My wonderful lady,
Come and be mine, mine, mine

Open to me
Let yourself fly on
I know we'll never go wrong
Open to me
Let yourself Fly on and on
Fly on

I see you
You

*tear* beautiful isn't it?

My Uni ball

2006-07-30T18:19:00.000+12:00

My uni ball was last night, I was on the committee organising it, so was there for almost 5 hours in the morning and early afternoon setting the place up. It was awesome turning up 1/2 an hour before the ball started and seeing the transformation that had taken place since I had left to go get ready! It was absolutely amazingly stunning - the decorations, lighting and everything was soo much better than I could have hoped for. We ended up having a good amount turn up and everyone seemed to enjoy themselves.

The sad thing was, that although I had heaps of mates around me, good music, good food etc. I ended up not having all that much fun! It was actually really tough being there without a partner, there were way to many slow songs played for my liking and it just wasn't the same without someone there to dance with.

I did enjoy myself, I'm not saying that... I just found myself becoming very melancholic about it all. Slipping back into my old way of thinking about things as described in my earlier post. I guess it was testing my resolve to wait on God for everything... and it was testing me hard! I'm not feeling all down about it in the main, just every now and then when I'm watching my mates with their boyfriends/potential boyfriends, it hits me. But it's OK, I know it's in God's hands, but it's still .... hard.

Why all the problems???

2006-07-25T19:02:00.000+12:00

Sometimes I wish that God didn't give me such a soft heart. But i don't really wish that, I wouldn't be the person that I am without that. But when I see people hurting, I hurt for them. And I don't just hurt I HURT. I've so often had those gut wrenching, lump in the throat, about to cry moments when I have friends pouring their heart out to me. I've even had an experience of my heart physically feeling as if it was tearing in two because of my anguish at the fact that there are so many hurting people in the world. It makes it hard for me sometimes, to go about my everyday life because I have so many burdens on my heart, so many people to worry about.

In fact I worry about the whole world. It's in a bad way, so many dying needlessly, so many killing merely because no one showed love to them, so many giving themselves away because that's all they think they can do, so many selling themselves for infinitely less than they are worth, so many with no choices, no freedoms, so many pressured into doing what they would never sanely do, merely because they don't know that there's another way, so many who have never heard of this other way.

I just can't stop feeling this way.

Here's a song/poem i wrote a while ago about this:

How can I look
around me
Without my heart
breaking
A life is lost,
another thrown away
I can't turn away
but I can't save them all

Only you
you give us hope
and you died
so the world could live
and rose again
victorious
over death and suffering

How can we sit here
waiting,
for the lost to come to you
You said Go to the world
How can we turn away

Only you
You give us hope
and you died
so the world could live
and rose again
victorious
over death and suffering

Copyright 2006 E.R.

I'll leave you with this verse:

James 1:27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

My placement!!!!!!! aaah scary

2006-07-19T07:14:00.000+12:00

I'm on placement at the moment! What's that? some of you may ask. It's when training teachers go into a classroom in a school. The first placement is mainly for observation but they may do a little bit of teaching.
It's weird, I'm back at my old school! It's fun though, and I know the teachers and I know my way around too, which always helps.
I'm with a yr 5/6 class, so they are too old to be cute, but they are nice and the class is pretty well behaved and respectful.
Yesterday I swapped with one of the other Trainee's and spent the afternoon in the yr1 class - Oh my gosh! They are so adorable - I just want one to take home with me! And i got to teach them a song:

The Lord loves me
And all the wonders I see
A rainbow shines through my window
The Lord loves me

And the sang and did the actions looking all angelic and cherub-like! It was so cute.
I think this kind of age (yr 1 and 2) is what I'd like to teach - but I haven't hardly had experience teaching that age yet, so don't really know! I know i'd definitely need to develop some more patience before teaching this level - although i think i am more patient with children than I am with adults - because they aren't supposed to know the stuff - that's why we are teaching them!

Anyways, thanks for hanging around to hear me out!

See you,

Random Rambler

My Xtend Xperience!

2006-07-19T06:55:00.000+12:00

Hey, I know you are all dying to hear how Xtend went!
For those of you who don't know, Xtend is a christian (predominantly Baptist) Youth camp that goes for one week in the june/july holidays at Otumotai (or however you spell that) Baptist Church and the surrounding churches and other venues.
All times are run on daylight saving to avoid having noise restrictions (so all these times are one hour earlier - real time)
A typical day looks like this:

before 8:45: Breakfast
Morning Meeting (worship, leaders testimonies)
Seminars (so many choices! some topics include; leadership, personality types, prayer, dating etc. etc. they are all really interesting!)
Small group study time ( work through similar to youth group studies - they are challenging and inspiring)
LUNCH TIME (one of the best times of the day!)
free time (for like 2 and a half hours - you can do anything you want! Roll down hills, go to town, go shopping etc.)
Workshops (more practical than seminars - craft, prayer for past hurts, recording a CD, visiting an old folks home, service project, art etc.)
Dinner
Evening meeting (worship, prayer, testimonies, response time - can go for hours but it doesn't feel like it goes that long!!)
SLEEP ( 5 hours if you are lucky)

So as you can see it's quite full on!!!!!!!! But it's so worth every minute of it - spending time with 230 young people passionate about God!

I know you are dying to here what I learnt, so here goes:

- I learnt that nothing should take the place of God as my goal in life (which has happened lately, sad to say it) I realised that lately I've been putting stuff like finding myself a good christian husband, succeeding in my education, my plans for the future, above serving my Lord! Not good, to say the least, so (one of my) missions now is to keep him at number one in my heart.

- I learnt that even when you don't feel that love for God you just need to keep going and worship him anyway!

- I learnt that so often we feel alone in our problem, but pretty much there will always be someone who has been through something similar.

- I learnt that we can't give up on God in the hard times ( I learnt this through helping a friend)

- I learnt that even a young NZ chick can make a difference, and I'm passionate about starting to do that!

If anyone wants to join an email list of people committed to praying for overseas missionaries and mission prayer requests - email me at farreachesoftheearth@gmail.com

Also if anyone is interested in Knitting squares to make into a blanket to go to Romanian orphans in Moldova ( i think that's the name) email me and I'll try sort that out.

- I learnt never to be ungrateful for what we have, even just waking up this morning is more than so many people in this world did.

My highlights:

Recording a song to CD!

Meeting a whole heap of fantastic people

Realising things that I can do to make a difference to those who have nothing

Helping friends to heal.

A fantastic night spent with friends

2006-07-09T10:44:00.000+12:00

Last night was my youth group formal dinner! I love getting all dolled up! It was great fun, even though not that many people turned up it was still a very enjoyable evening, we danced liked madwomen! Sorry I'll be AWOL this next week but I'm heading of to Xtend camp in Tauranga from monday to saturday - but I'll have lots to talk about when I get back!
Have great weeks Y'all!

Are we addicted to love?

2006-07-07T13:08:00.000+12:00

Hey all my fans! (i know, i know, don't count your chickens before they've hatched, but y'know i like counting eggs!)

This isn't exactly what you'd expect from a first blog - but I think too much, so start expecting the unexpected!

Recently, I surrendered an attraction that I had to a good guy mate of mine, to God. Surrendered? I hear you asking. Yes, surrendered. God asked me to stop liking him, I don't fully understand why, but I think it was causing a distraction from my relationship with God. So I said, "OK God if that's what you want me to do, then help me to do it!" and He has! Now, that's all well and good, I've gotten over it and moved on. I even composed a picture on my cell phone that says "Jesus is the king of my heart, not any boy". Cheesy, I know, but I needed something that would keep reminding me about it, so that's what i did.

Now, I find myself, such a short time later, wistfully wishing that I had a special someone by my side, imagining the day of our wedding and so on and so forth. I wonder if maybe God doesn't want me to get married ever, I wish that I'd met 'the one'. Now, last night, after putting down the fantastic (christian) romance/suspense novel that i'd been reading (True Devotion, by Dee Henderson - I highly recommend it!) I got to thinking about my special someone (as described above), now I know you will probably say that it's just a girl thing, and maybe it is, maybe the phenomenon that i'm diagnosing is that widespread! I realised, I'm addicted to romance fantasy. True, it is a fantasy that may, hopefully, one day come true, but at the moment it's still a fantasy.

I started thinking about this even deeper, and I wondered, is this healthy? Is it healthy for a huge chunk of my time to be taken up by being distracted by someone I don't even know, someone that may not even ever come along. What do you think? Are you addicted to this romance fantasy too?

Signing out,

Random Rambler